New Years Shmew Years

Another year has gone by. Another jaunt around our star. Another rather arbitrary tick of time that we memorialize. Let’s tally up our timely ticks:

1) One rotation of our rocky planet around itself equals a day.

2) One rotation of our rocky moon around the earth is, generally speaking, a month. I’m completely unclear as to how February got fucked on this one.

3) One rotation of our planet around our sun is a year.

4) One rotation of our solar system around our galaxy is…well crap, I don’t think there is a name for that. Well there probably is, but it’s something that only a stuffy astronomer would know. They would make it something pretentious sounding so they would be the only ones to care about it and be able to recall it. My guess is they might call it Galactic Disk Celestial Rotational Repositioning Time Passage. I like Galactic Epoch and if it’s not officially called that, then I claim credit if someone reading this decides to use it. I don’t want much in return considering that it takes about 225 million years for this to happen and dinosaurs were just showing up on Earth.

We really don’t celebrate much each day when the sun rises. We get up, get ready for the day and for most of us, we go to work only to return home and do it all over again. No one goes to be and thinks about the New Day Resolutions they are going to try to stick to in the upcoming day. I suppose someone could do that, but really, how easy is it to say, “for the next day, I’m going to eat better and lose weight?” FAIL! We’d stop the New Day Resolutions as quickly as we started.

New Month Resolutions might be a bit easier to complete as there is more time to ramp up and complete something. Short of those tricky February New Month Resolution that lose 2+ days of execution time, I think they might be an option.

Then we have New Years. Put your silly glasses on, act like an ass and make a promise that you won’t keep. That’s about what New Years has become. It’s really just an excuse to party because it’s not such a miracle that we survived another year. I know, some people might say that we haven’t blow ourselves up yet and that’s a milestone worth celebrating, but we should almost celebrate that on a daily basis then which puts us back to a New Days celebration with drinking on New Days Eve and an eventual complete collapse of a functional society…a lot like Ireland or Russia.

So what does celebrating the new year really mean anyway? Now the Galactic Epoch, that would be something to celebrate.


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